Of Smiles and Sunshine

i never thought i'll have to face it again.
i thought i had already conquered it.
never did i know it was already back,
slowly eating into the depths of my heart.













there are so many things i wanna pen down... but somehow i'm speechless wordless at the moment.

i hate it when i'm alone with my thoughts. they tend to wander and become irritatingly pessimistic when i'm trying to keep myself afloat... should i give up? should i cling onto some hope? these thoughts shouldn't exist in me now... or so i hoped. yet when i was left alone for an hour or so these thoughts just invaded my conscious... and i hate it. didn't i promise not to give up so easily? could i choose not to give up so easily in my current circumstances?

i was so happy moments ago. i was happy with my new possessions... 2 pairs of shoes (finally!) and like 20 manga books... all to help me kill time and stop me from thinking too much. in the end? haha sometimes it feels like mockery.

pls dun give up. 加油 何庆瑜！













work starting in about an hour's time... wish me luck! ^^