Of Smiles and Sunshine

as i delve deeper and deeper into the work i'm currently involved in, i start to realize how vast the effects of certain events and actions have on the entire company and its workers. i realize how important efficiency (and not just paperwork) is, which is something hard to achieve. sometimes it really doesn't pay to be nice, take the company policy of paying advances for example. the workers would like to go up to the accounts department and complain of short payment from the company, when the company was just taking back the advances they paid the workers earlier to help them tide over the month. and i thought being irresponsible at work or just taking leave as and when i like wouldn't affect the company much. but the company is now in trouble because of many workers who are so irresponsible and they can't have enough manpower to carry out the tasks they promised others to do. and initially i thought my coworkers were cold and unfeeling. but actually they feel for their workers alot. and i really do mean alot. reading all those faxes of daily reports from the workers made me realize how much hardship the workers go through while everyday i just sit in my air con office and complain how tiring it is for me to look and process all the huge chunks of data or to make photocopies the entire day. i suppose it's really time for me to learn to be 知足...
11:33am
although we can't tell how things will be like in the future,
i'm glad you're the one that i **** ** **** ****.
i want to thank you so much for all the things you did
from lending me your jacket during movies,
to just you appearing in my life.
i'm not perfect, i have so many flaws.
i fear you might stop liking me someday cos of my flaws,
i fear that we might drift apart slowly...
but the things you do reassure me,
that my fears were just me thinking too much.
i thank you.
i **** you (i think)
i M u... haha~ ^^
what's 知足?
to be content with the current state of things?
to learn to appreciate and push down your greedy desires?
i think that's something that's really hard to achieve for a lot of us. ^^
looking at those workers who try all ways to get more money from the company...
how different am i from them in terms of our greed? lol~
i really should appreciate what i have in life now =))

so... i'm sorry for making you feel even a lil pressurized.
what will the future hold?
if i were to slowly let you go...
will you come back to my side?
or would you be like a kite,
once i let go of the string holding it...
it'll disappear into the endless sky?
i'm afraid of being overly greedy.
i'm afraid of not wanting to let go
(even if i might have to at the very end)
so maybe i should give myself this test...
and see if this is really... destiny or just mere coincidence. ^^

i'm tired from a day of work... but... hey hey~ my dear cutie is waiting for me! 裴勇俊 is just so so so charsmatic! ok lah i mean in the show "the legend"... i really like the soundtrack (irony: the OST costs as much as the dvd set... lmao)... and i like the graphic effects... and of course i *heart* 裴勇俊! opps the other day my mum was just commenting abt him being a 师奶杀手... *implying i'm as auntie as them lars*... i insist! i'm just drawn by charsmatic men k?

and then... there's my darling psp waiting for me... omg i'm so damn busy man... where got time to rest properly? hees!