Of Smiles and Sunshine

i admit... i was extremely tired...

be it physically or mentally...

for the past three nights, i couldn't sleep properly at all... it's either i keep waking up in the middle of the night, or i woke up in the middle of the sleep and can't go back to lala land... or simply... i juz stood awake the whole night, juz closing my eyes trying to coax myself to sleep... *which obviously din work...*

spent the whole of my saturday trying to grab a little sleep... took a two hour afternoon nap *which is usually a lot for me* but still, keep waking up in the middle of the nap...

it was only yesterday night.... slept at ard 1130 bah.... sleep all the way till 840... that's ard 9 hours... finally...

i guess everybody has their limits bah... i think i stretched myself too much le... for the past week...until even i myself couldn't take it...

and things juz fell apart..

so now i guess i'll have to try to pick those pieces up and somehow mend it all back together...













it had been... a rather scary week for me... though it's festive season and stuff....

i've seen too many pple throwing their temper ard...

juz on friday... i saw/heard alan scolding his aunt off over the phone without holding back at all... it was... honestly speaking... extremely scary... i have no idea why... but i felt so afraid though he's not scolding me... and i felt a little like crying oso... hahaz~ furnies siaz~ but heyz.. i realised how scary it is for someone to be angry and start losing his/her mind.... so i guess it's kinda a reminder for myself to learn to tolerate more... and to keep my cool in face of problems and stuff... instead of juz letting myself vent my anger by scolding pple off... it doesn't look good, neither does it feel good... no point doing things which does not benefit anybody, i guess...

though sometimes anger helps u achieve things, but i guess... under normal circumstances, this reason usually does not stand...



another new year resolution... to learn to control my emotions and handle them better... not to say that i become a stoic or wad... i admit that last time, i felt that being logical is much better than being emotional... but now... i can't say the same anymore... i thought i was quite stoic last time, but these three years i've proven myself wrong... and i guess i can't change myself as simply as i say, and i guess, i can only slowly adjust but not change my emotional personality totally...













arr~ after my big big breakfast of a chicken and ham pie... now i'm feeling so so full... until i feel like bursting.. =S

hahaz.. the above is crap.. =P

i wanna thank those who showed me concern... pple like my kor... and randy... thankx guys... thankx kor for being there when i needed someone to talk to... and thankx randy for always looking out for me... really appreciate that.. =)

arr... going out liao... cya soon... =)