Of Smiles and Sunshine

another late night where everyone else has gone to sleep. all except my lone self, left with my dark thoughts.



sometimes i wonder. when we choose a character to play in a game, does it reflect our true inner self? or just our hopes? i've got a friend who always like to play tanking/knight characters... and i think his character suits the role he always plays... he's the kind who would take on challenges and problems in life head on... and i admire him for that...

me? i always end up playing the cleric. why?... because i can't stand it when everyone else wants to become strong and powerful, forgetting that they need buffs to become stronger and blah blah blah. i guess that's me then. the crowd pleaser. disliking attention and always like to hide away from problems. always relying on others to become stronger "because" it's hard for me to stand on my own two feet. maybe that's the real me in life. or on the other hand, maybe it's just my wish/hope that i can become a healer in life. which is the exact opposite now since i'm the one hurting others, not healing them. how ironic.



just today during my lesson with my tuition kid, mark... somehow we strayed to the topic about how long it takes for one to jump down from xxx storeys high... and, taking g= 10m/s^2... assuming each floor is ard 3m tall, if we jump from the 13th floor it'll take approximately 2s for our whole life to flash by! 100th storey? slightly more than 4s! is our life that short for the whole duration to flash by in a mere 4s? i don't think so right? so we should find a even taller building to jump down next time... yeah right.

but due to that "funny" conversation we had... the "dark" side of me came back... remember how i mentioned i always picture the worse happening to me quite some time ago? it came back straight after the lesson... like how when i was walking to post a letter for my parents... this car came into the car park i was cutting through and i had the image of me being hit by the car and ambulances rushing me to the hospital... >_<>_< but yeap... i felt happy when people ask me this kind of things that makes me think more... though he makes me puke blood when it comes to maths, everything else is quite fun... like his guitar and his lameness..... zzz. i concede defeat when he really makes up his mind to be lame LOL



ok finally the sleep bug has caught onto me... time to rest!